Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Where has the time gone?

Second semester is almost over? Really? It seems like time has just flown. This semester has brought both trials and rejoicing. We'll start with the bad news just to get it over with quickly. Like a Band-Aid.

My back is still giving me trouble in regards to playing violin. So, I've resumed the search for a neurologist on my insurance who can hopefully tell me what is going on (and fix the problem). It's been hard, because it seems like nobody in Springfield accepts my health insurance! So now I need to start looking for one back home, I guess. It's really frustrating.

Along the same lines, this summer is going to have to be the summer that I get answers. This summer, I need to find out if playing the violin will continue to be painful for the rest of my life. I'm really afraid that I'll have to give up violin...but at the same time, I sort of want to give up now just so that I can get out ahead. It would hurt so much to have a doctor tell me that I need to give up violin...I almost feel like it wouldn't hurt as bad if it were completely my choice.

I'm really afraid that I don't have the kind of "Sun Stand Still" faith that I need to get through this. I'm so scared that God won't keep me holding on. I'm absolutely terrified that He'll let the sun go down on my music. Did I mention that I'm scared?

On a more positive note, I think I'm finally building some great friendships! I'm really getting involved in my church, and I love it. Especially volunteering at the elementary school! :) I miss my home church, though. But I am really thankful for the college ministry here, it's really fantastic, and I couldn't have asked for a better one.

I'll try to be better about posting on here in the future!

Additional thoughts: I've been doing a lot of reading on forgiveness and God's love lately. Really excited to see what He shows me.